My Friend, Stiff

Once upon a time..

After my form 5, me and a few friends went to work temporarily while waiting for our SPM results. The office is not really huge, but that time was their peak period. So they got a few temp staff to clear off their work. While working, we got to know another temp staff by the name of Steve. Steve is 2 yrs older than us and he is waiting for his STPM result.

Since Steve is just about our age, he joined us for lunch every day and somehow we were like buddies.

One day, one of my friends asks him, ‘So Steve, actually I wanted to ask you this question forever. Your name is spelt S-T-E-V-E, or S-T-I-F-F?’

Steve felt abit weird, and replied, ‘S-T-E-V-E la… where got ppl name STIFF one? D’uh!!’ (not exact word but something like that). We were all laughing, not sure at my friend’s stupid question, or Steve’s reaction of being asked a stupid question.

Now fast forward 15 years later..

Steve, if you are reading this…







REALLY GOT PEOPLE NAME STIFF ONE OK!!!

Clarification: The one who asked that question is NOT me!

See, I where got sinkalan you?

Siao!

The other day as usual I am hanging around with my buddies at my area. Then suddenly came 2 strangers seated nearby us. One guy and one girl. The girl mumbles something to that guy after seeing us and both giggles. Siao.

The guy use his finger and pointed at me. And move his finger, like instructing me to follow him. He think what? We stupid ah? Just use your finger and point point thinking we will follow? Siao.

Then the girl pointed at my friend, saying his eye is fake. What fake? My friend’s eye is a bit bigger but how can she be so insensitive and says his eye is fake? Siao.

After a while, they started eating. At first, it’s ok as they are just eating lump of rice but later we realized they are eating something funny inside the rice! We can sense what they are eating is so wrong! This is outrageous!! Siao!

They are eating our relatives :(













This is most likely what that red fish thinks while we chomped down the sushi next to that aquarium..

Eh, I no sinkalan you one ok.

How crappy.

Adios.

Model?

These days with the popularity of DSLR cameras, suddenly everyone is a photographer. And because of this, there are alot of models as well. See FB, once a while there will be people publishing their work, either from aspiring photographers, or aspiring models. Even in dailychilli website, there is a section dedicated to self-proclaimed models.

But hor, the point I wanna stress is... those models in dailychilli damn sad la.. Below are a few photos i nicked from there...
What kind of pose is this leh? Nice meh? Looks like she is in the midst off pulling her head of in a horror movie..

Then this guy..

Don't have enough photo to post? A caricature? Think this is a comic book audition meh?

This girl lagi funny..

Can see the face ah? Photo like this also can be published as model? Wo de tian ah.....

Tell me, what happened to kick ass photos like this one? This is what we called Real Model ok!














How crappy..

Adios!

ps: to all the models up there, if you happen to read this, nothing personal ok.. it's just that the photos are ugly. what? criticism leads to improvement ma..!

Raya Songs

Year in year out, the same old Raya Songs. Balik Kampung la.. what else? Yoh, all the regulars la! Boring!

This year why not the local artists do some cover version of international songs with some Raya mood? Here are a few I can think of:

1) Ampun Is The Hardest Word: oa Elton John
2) Sirap In A Bottle: oa Christina Aguilera
3) Always Raya: oa Bon Jovi
4) Raya Don’t Cry: oa Fergie
5) I Just Call To Say Slamat Hari Raya: oa Stevie Wonder
6) Lemang Tree: oa Fool’s Farden
7) Hot and Cold Cincau: oa Katy Perry
8) Kurma California: oa The Eagles
9) Every Morning Syawal: oa Sugar Ray
10) Salam 25 Minutes: oa MLTR

oa=original artist

With songs like this, Raya will rawks!

Yusof Tileessss...

If you happens to listen to radio, especially English channel, there is this annoying ads with background of lounge music and a deep male voice naming different type of supreme quality dates and then a women voice whispering ‘Yusof Tiles’ at an interval of every 2 seconds. WTF on earth is a tiles company selling dates for Ramadhan??

The answer is, the ads is from Yusof Tayoob, a well known food importer, exporter and distributor (nick’d from Yuta’s website). So the woman’s voice is actually whispering Yusof Tayoob instead of Yusof Tiles.. But let me listen again. Is it Tiles of Tayoob… Aiyoh, whisper properly la…

Aiyah, I no sinkalan you one la...

Miracles

Remember this news?

I think we will know what happened next year when the suicide note miraculously appear to save the day.

Miracles do happens when there is no answer.

How crappy..

Adios!

My Strepsils

Is Strepsils a sweet?
When you see your fren got a pack of Strepsils, will you ask for one?

Yesterday I was having a bad sore throat. So I went to a shop nearby and got myself a pack of Strepsils. Then a colleague saw and say, ‘Eh, got sweets. Can I have 1?’

I was a bit reluctant to spare because I need all the 6 of them for my sore throat. But not to offend him, I just pass him 1.

Strepsils is not a sweet ok! It’s a sore throat medicine. And it cost a freaking 50 sen each.

Do you ask for a Panadol from your friend when you see him eating one?

D’uh!